– Can you cry under water?

– How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered?

– Why do you have to ‘put your two cents in’…. but it’s only a ‘penny for your thoughts’? Where’s that extra penny going to?

– Once you’re in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes you were buried in for eternity?

– Why does a round pizza come in a square box?

– What disease did cured ham actually have?

– How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?

– Why is it that people say they ‘slept like a baby’ when babies wake up like every two hours?

– If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?

– Why are you IN a movie, but you’re ON TV?

– Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?

– Why do doctors leave the room while you change? They’re going to see you naked anyway…

– Why is ‘bra’ singular and ‘panties’ plural?

– If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, what is baby oil made from?

– Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog’s face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him for a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?

– Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are getting dead?

– Why do banks charge a fee on ‘insufficient funds’ when they know there is not enough money?

– Whose idea was it to put an ‘S’ in the word ‘lisp’?